April 6, 2018

Friday
Romans 12:12

Aimee Rosier

My social media feed was covered with posts of baby bump pictures and the baby announcements of others. This should have been something that brought me joy! Instead, Satan used it as a way to fill me with anger, envy, discontentment, and doubt. God seemed so silent in my life. My prayer was the same and I never heard His answer. I just waited. Month after month, year after year, the pregnancy test would come back negative and the pain and confusion went deeper. Satan crept into my heart and told me lies about how broken and undeserving I was.

I knew parenthood was God’s plan for us, yet His silence left me feeling that maybe I was missing the path He had for me. God placed several situations and people in my life that lead me to adoption. There were several amazing families at FBCL who told us their beautiful stories. With each story we heard, our hearts softened and we let the Lord redirect our parenting path. We selected an adoption agency and signed up for an orientation weekend. We traveled out of town to attend and left with amazing peace and joy in our hearts. That Sunday night when we returned, I got a positive pregnancy test. The first thing I thought was: “But Lord, we’re supposed to adopt...?” It was this moment that I knew God was present and smiling. It was His plan all along to bring me to this place, to that feeling … GRACE.

Adoption gave me hope again, and through that peace and hope, the Lord gave me grace. Unmerited favor. I knew He was there and that I had never—and would never—be alone. I knew He was good. And I knew this was part of His calling for my life—to love my children the way He loves me and to keep my heart open to adoption so that He can use me or my home for His perfect plans in His perfect time.

My husband's name is Caleb and my kids are Ryan (age 4) and Ruby (age 2.5).